Woot!

Looks like we’re not doing it again (for now). My X-rays and bone scan came back clear. That’s such a huge weight off my shoulders!

April 24, 2018

Are we gonna do this again? Not sure. I should find out in the next day or so.

I started having pain in one of my right ribs about two weeks ago. It could be a sign that my cancer has metastasized into the bone, or it could be nothing. I talked to my oncologist about it and she wanted to do diagnostics on it, so today I went over for several chest x-rays and a full-body bone scan. Results are pending right now. This is one of those times in my life I’d loooove to be wrong. Really wrong. Ridiculously wrong. Bone metastasis is bad news. Either way though, at least I got a rejuvenating nap on the table during my bone scan? Also, here’s a photo of me yet again enjoying ARA’s snazzy gowns, just because.

BoobNews: "It's sweet to bee recovering" edition

December, 2016

I just got back from checking in with my plastic surgeon and almost everything seems to be healing beautifully. It looks so good that she said, "Maybe I should have you hold a sign that says Dr. Potter did it!" I laughed and told her if she gave me the sign I'd be happy to hold it for her. The only thing that's not healing in an above average way is my new navel. The plan? Put honey on it. Yep, medical-grade honey can help wound healing so I'm going to be extra-sweet for the near future! Good thing it's not the spring yet, so at least I don't have to worry about bees trying to start a new hive in my belly.

BoobNews: "Grody to the abs, dude" edition

I ended up spending five days on the Intermediate Care unit (IMC) at Seton after my surgery, spent this past weekend at home, and then headed over to my plastic surgeon's office yesterday for follow-up. Thank you to my sister who came in from Houston to perform chauffeur duties for me.

While I was there, my plastic surgeon's PA, Rachel, assessed how upright I'm allowed to stand for this week. Apparently I'm healing well enough that I can stand a little more upright without risking pulling my abdominal incisions apart. That meant I got to raise my bad-ass walker up by two more notches. Sure, the blacking-out made raising it up take a few more minutes, but sometimes coolness requires trade-offs in practicality. No one's gonna separate me from my speed-demon walker. I think I'll name her Louise. Although, honestly, Louise could use a cup holder, and maybe a basket, but I'm afraid they might create too much drag. Gotta stay streamlined.

As far as healing goes, I have to say that despite this surgery being much more extensive than the double mastectomy, the acute pain this time is much less. That's largely thanks to the drains being much less uncomfortable. That said, Rachel, was able to pull all four of the drains yesterday, and I'm still glad to have the dumb things out. While I was there, she also assessed the healing of my abdominal wound, my new belly button, and the incisions on my new boobs, and pronounced them all as great. She and my IMC nurses (all of whom were great - I highly recommend them for all of your reconstructive recovery needs) say that my wounds all look and are healing better than average. Woo! I love being an over-achiever!

So that brings us to the grody part. Those of you who aren't interested, thanks for reading this far and I'll keep you updated in the future. Those of you (fellow) weirdos who love to see medical/somewhat gross stuff, feel free to revel in my small abdominal incision...

BoobNews: "Vroom vroom" edition

I got home from the hospital today at around noon. The incision wounds to my abdomen, belly button, and both breasts all look really good and seem to be healing unusually well. I came home with all four drains still in place (2 for my abdomen, 2 for my chest) but the volumes draining to them are pretty low so hopefully we'll be able to pull most, if not all, of them out on Monday.

Meanwhile, the Percocets are doing their job pretty well keeping me reasonably comfortable. To walk around at all I have to use a walker, though, because I'm not allowed to straighten my body all the way for about three weeks. Otherwise, my internal and/or external abdominal stitches can pull apart. I don't think I want that adventure.

Since I have to use a walker though, I decided it needed to be pimped out. My fellow riders will notice the blacked-out look with pipe wrap on the headers, which adds +5 hp at the crank. That means I'm now faster than a Harley. Note, also, the bell on the handlebar. When you're moving this fast, you can't afford someone not noticing and pulling out in front of you. Revzilla stickers applied to look extra legit.

So I know you're probably intimidated, but who's ready to drag race this puppy?

BoobNews: "New Boobs" edition

Posted 11/28/2016 6:00am

Today is reconstruction day. I last saw my plastic surgeon about a month ago and was told to start protein loading to help my body prepare to heal itself. And now here we are.

The surgery is called a DIEP flap procedure (http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/breast_center/treatments_services/reconstructive_breast_surgery/deep_inferior_epigastric_artery_perforator_diep_flap.html) where she'll cut me from hip to hip, remove a football-shaped section of skin, tissue, and muscle and use that to reconstruct my chest. It's about a 6 hour surgery with four days in the hospital afterwards.

Initially I was told that it had a 4-8 week recovery so I figured I'd be back up and at 'em by four weeks out but my surgeon's PA popped that bubble. "Yeah, people who go back to work after 4 weeks usually only work part time. At a desk job." Got it. So, more like 6 weeks in my case.

On the up-side I come out of surgery this afternoon with new boobs, a tummy tuck, 4 new drains that look like grenades hanging off of me, and a walker that I'm going to mod for peak performance. Look out, IMC hospital unit. Here I come...

BoobNews: "And now we wait" edition

Posted: 8/8/2016

Today it's been exactly 40 weeks since I started treatment for my cancer, the same amount of time as a full-term pregnancy. But instead of creating life I've been working to maintain it.

My original to-do list was...
Step 1: Portacath surgically implanted in my chest for my IV chemo treatments.
Step 2: 5 months total of chemo. Ok, it ended up being 4 months instead. Stupid neuropathy.
Step 3: Double mastectomy.
Step 4: 6 weeks of daily radiation treatments.
Step 5: Take an estrogen-blocking pill (tamoxifen) every day for 10 years.
Step 6: Not die.

So far, so good. I've completed all 6 steps so far, with a Step 5.5 thrown in there that's yet to be completed, which is finishing out the reconstruction. That surgery will be right after Thanksgiving and, since it's actually a more extensive surgery than the mastectomy itself was, I'll have a 4-6 week recovery time afterward.

Now, because they found some metastasis when they biopsied the lymph nodes from my mastectomy, my cancer was upgraded from Stage 2A to Stage 3A. Because of this, my oncologist has asked me to also consider having an oophorectomy (removal of my ovaries) or a hysterectomy (removing all of the reproductive things). But really, if you're gonna do it, why wouldn't you go all the way? Bag up that whole box and throw it to the curb!

She suggested it because removing these potential sources of future metastasis would MAYBE further reduce my risk of cancer recurrence. The down side is it also would require me to change my 10-year medication course from the Tamoxifen, which is a now-known entity in terms of side effects (which range from bearable to slightly beneficial) to a completely different class of daily medication, which may have completely different side effects. For 10 years. Would the side effects be better? Worse? Who knows? It's an unknown until I actually do it. So that's still under consideration, too. I'll probably end up doing the hysterectomy just to be safe but oh, Magic 8 Ball, why are you not effective?! Step up your game! Earn your $8 price!

Which brings us to the below comic that I saw a few days ago. It summarizes where I am right now really well. (You can see the full-size version here: https://xkcd.com/931/) Maybe the cancer won't come back and skipping a hysterectomy and a different medication regimen wouldn't matter. Yay! But maybe it will try to come back, metastasized to my lady parts, which are completely useless and irrelevant to me at this point in my life. They're like the "Rick Perry's Choice of Vice-Presidential Running Mate" of body parts! Which means the hysterectomy and medication trade-out would definitely be worth it.

That said, maybe the cancer will try to come back, but by metastasizing to one of the other areas it likes to jump to: bone, bone marrow, brain, lungs, lymphatic system. Then I'm just screwed and the above would have been irrelevant, too. *Sad trombone*

So, now I just try to make the best choices as far as trade-offs that I can and watchfully wait. Hopefully, I'm waiting for nothing.

Fuck cancer.